Are you that person that always finds themselves rescheduling your own plans just so you can adjust to someones lifestyle? When you’ve done this enough times you start to wonder why can’t they amend their plans for me and you start to feel as if you don’t mean enough to this person(s). Yes this is a common feeling amongst so many other people, including myself you are not alone. Its time to change that.
I want you to reflect on all the people in your life currently and one by one dissect their abilities to make time for you regardless of their own schedules, consider these factors when analysing:
- Have they considered your schedule first? (do they ask you if your busy first or just assume you’ll be free for them at any given time?)
- Are they able to change their plans for you? (do they offer to change up their plans before assuming you will change yours first?)
- Have they made the effort to follow up with you? e.g( keep you posted throughout the day rather than drop you a late message/call thinking you’ll be available for them?)
How many people are you actually left with? Most likely you ended with less than 5 or zero. Don’t be sad that’s just part of life, people are busy no matter how close you think they are to you. There’s only a few or even one that will make you a priority in their lives, they will put aside their hobbies and interests and choose you for that moment. The start of lockdown was an eye opener for myself. Who made the effort to see you before these gruelling 4 weeks ? Keep those individuals, they understand the value of having company. There are so many people out their who are living alone or just can’t be vocal with the people at home so take this time to check in on them, a friend could surely help lessen the silence.
Prioritise your own time, maybe you need to become busier…put yourself first…set goals and tasks that will get you to that next level. Help other people who may just appreciate you more than your current circle. The key lesson here is to invest in people who only invest in you. Most of the time we think we will “break our backs” to keep people happy and sweet but in reality we’re only hurting ourselves and drawing out unnecessary emotions. So your task for today is to go through the list of people and ask yourself the questions above. I’m not saying cut these people out of your life because they can still be good mates but put yourself first. If they don’t like it then they were never meant to be in your life in the first place, as cliche as that sounds its the truth.
